On being a "new" mom

I hate to admit that my blog posts are becoming a once-a-month event. With such an exhausting energetic baby, the computer is taking a back seat most days. That's a good thing, though.

Since one of my good friends just had a baby last month, I've been thinking a lot about being a "new" mom. There is no shortage of babble on the internet about what it's like to be a first-time parent, but it's hard to sort through the junk and find the good stuff. I could conveniently list all the things that are awesome or terrifying challenging about it, but hey - I'm a new mom! I'm not that organized!!!

Instead, I'll post cute pictures and videos and a couple of amusing anecdotes. So, first-time parents make lots of mistakes, right? I took Graeme to the park with some friends a little while ago and had a blast with him on the swings.

After all that adorable excitement, I picked him up out of said swing and suddenly needed two hands for something else. Can't tell you what it was... maybe something out of the diaper bag?! In any case, I set G down on the ground. All of you well-rested adults with coherent thoughts swimming around in your heads can probably see that the ground in these photos is covered with mulch. Didn't occur to me at the time. As soon as I set the little rascal down, he promptly grabs a handful of mulch and shoves it in his mouth. As I frantically try to scrape it out, I'm laughing at myself on the inside. Of course, he would try to eat the mulch, you dummy!!! It didn't seem like a big deal until he proceeded to scream bloody murder the entire way home, which made me obsess about the piece of mulch that may or may not have been lodged in his tiny esophagus. I've been on the lookout for mulchy poop ever since, but no dice. False alarm, I guess.

I'm sure there are babies all over the world currently munching on a handful of mulch, dirt, or rocks (eek!) from wherever their inexperienced parents happen to sit them down. It's comforting to me to know that even though new parenthood often feels isolating and lonely, there are other people all over this planet doing the same dumb things. 

Poor babies are globally being subjected to their clueless parents' experiments like guinea pigs whether they like it or not. Here's one I tried with G this very morning. He's been suffering from some vicious diaper rash for a couple of days, so I thought we'd try a little naked time to air out the situation. Can you already see where this is going? In my efforts to avoid an accident, I waited until after I changed his dirty diaper, cleaned him up and stripped him down. Not 5 minutes after he began free-balling around the nursery... he stopped mid-crawl and pooped on the carpet. Good times. And lesson learned.

No, I didn't take a picture of the embarrassing poop incident to blackmail him with during his teenage years, so I'll leave you with my favorite video of him so far. He learned how to dance, which is pretty much the best thing ever. I didn't teach him how on purpose (although I'd give the kid $50 to call me "mama" at this point) but he just started grooving in his high chair one morning. In hindsight, it occurred to me that he was actually imitating my dorky movements when I sing along to the Pandora Disney station. So, I did teach it to him, but not on purpose. That's a terrifying thought. What else have I already taught him by accident???